Shaken Not Stirred

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Magical Products

I was wondering, what if there was truth in advertising? What if the the products worked the way most commercials promised they would. You know, that damn headache stick Head-On really could make the pain of a headache go away just because you rubbed it on your forehead over and over and over and over again, just like in the ad.

If I answered some of those emails and sent away for a pump or some organically grown, natural enhancement medication, my penis would not be average in size, but actually a few inches bigger. I wouldn't be embarassed about my average size. Hell I would buy stock in the company if I thought the product really worked.

Is signing up for Geiko so easy that a caveman could do it? I've never thought of signing up for any sort of insurance as easy. There is so much paperwork and so many questions to answer. And is it really "good news" to save that much money?

How about Ranch dressing? The last one I saw had a guy sitting by himself in a small cramped kitchen, while outside it was dark and raining. The moment he poured some dressing on his salad, he was outside, it was sunny and he was no longer alone. He was surrounded by people. So am I to assume that like hallucinagenics Ranch can make us "experience" things like this. Wow, for only $2.99 for 16 ounces, that's a lot of zoning. Kinda cheap if you ask me.

I don't know why I'm ranting. This shouldn't even be a real post, it's just boredom and having nothing real to write about.


  • So. What have you been up to? ;-)

    By Blogger missy, at 1:42 AM  

  • Hahahahaha! I LOVED this post! Right on the money! You crack me up:-)

    By Anonymous Babette, at 9:21 AM  

  • Yes I do believe if all that stuff advertised worked so well it might cost a little bit more than those low prices.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 6:33 PM  

  • All I know is that tge Geiko cavemen crack me up...and honestly...that's all I need to know. ;)


    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 6:51 PM  

  • If products served their original purpose, they'd never need to be replaced. And where would the economy be then?! We'd all be living in trees and painting with our fingers!

    By Blogger Gyrobo, at 12:13 AM  

  • How about those cell phone commericals that have the "network" following you around everywhere you go?

    By Blogger Lucy Stern, at 12:47 AM  

  • What, you mean it's not all true ?!?! I am shocked, isn't everything on TV and Radio real ?!?! Oh no, what does this all mean !!!
    Anyway, great post, even though you thought you had nothing to say.
    Hope you have a great weekend.
    Take care, Meow

    By Blogger Meow, at 2:01 AM  

  • I wonder what Ranch dressing can do for me...

    By Blogger LBseahag, at 1:08 PM  

  • Rambling is fun. My blog is full of it. I prefer yours.

    By Blogger Christopher, at 8:52 AM  

  • I would love to mess with Bigfoots like in the jerky commercials.

    By Blogger :P fuzzbox, at 5:16 PM  

  • Good post from an ordinary, average guy...

    By Blogger the duck, at 5:04 PM  

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