Shaken Not Stirred

Friday, January 19, 2007

Body Juices

Things like sweat, blood, saliva, urine shouldn't gross me out. I've dealth with them in laboratory settings and collected them from patients on my clinical rotation. But today I was grossed out enough to emit that puke sound from my throat. I mean really grossed out.

I went to the gym early this morning. I have dinner with my aunt and uncle tonight and who knows how long that would last. I love talking to my aunt. She's a respected physician, with good advice for taking the Step 2 of the USMLE's. Constantly testing my knowledge and trying to slip one under (and then she explains the question thoroughly). So I went to the gym early.

When I got there, the stair-steppers were full. The treadmills and stationary bikes were full. I looked down at the sign-up sheet and one of the stair-steppers was going to be free in about five minutes (number 3). I looked and saw a humongo man sweating himself into dehydration on it. He was practically bathing in his perspiration. Ding!! He was done. He stepped down and then proceeded to wipe the machine down. When he stepped away from it, I climbed on. I entered my body weight, the time that I would like the machine to run for, the type of excercise I wanted the machine to do for me (you know up and down, cross country, mountains etc). I stepped on, poppped my iPod with The Fray to start me off and started my exercise. Fifteen minutes into the stepping, I had to grap the rail to reposition myself, my hand slipped. I was thinking WTF? I looked down and saw that the whole lower rung was soaking wet. The dude hadn't completely cleaned off his sweat. I could have puked right there. The guy beside me said something like "I never want to go after him. He leaves all kinds of sweat everywhere--even on the weight machines".

Later, after driving home from the gym, I saw a chick jogging along the highway. She was wearing one of those aerodynamic jogging suits--the kind that looks painted onto her body. She was pretty cute and healthy looking. She then spit a goober into the air. It was big enough for me to see from my peripheral vision--and she was completely on the other side of the road, going in the opposite direction. Completely grossed out now. Not only was I still reeling from touching some guys sweat, but this girl hawking a goober. Why can't people just keep their juices to themselves?


  • I'm going to spit in an envelope and mail it to you. ;)


    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:09 PM  

  • ewww God! I can't believe you didn't throw up. I would have.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:19 PM  

  • Slimy! Do a full investigation before getting on the machine:)

    By Anonymous Babette, at 2:45 PM  

  • Its just sweat and spit. Those are probably the two least disgusting body juices. I think you are over-reacting.

    By Anonymous whatigotsofar, at 3:28 PM  

  • Eewwwwww ... that's just plain yucky !!
    Take care, Meow

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:15 AM  

  • dude, you need to buy your own stairstepper

    By Blogger Badoozie, at 2:05 PM  

  • I've rarely had the need to cough up a spleen-sized hocker while running. Why do so many others feel that urge?

    -- david

    By Blogger David Amulet, at 2:38 PM  

  • Well I like when they put their juices on my little man!

    By Blogger Big Ben, at 5:24 PM  

  • I would agree with you in most instances, but I guess I won't comment on the other area that I am thinking about.
    Hope you are having a great weekend.

    By Blogger Lee Ann, at 9:01 PM  

  • hahahhahahaha

    i might do what steven novak is gonna do...

    i personally like to "Farmer Blow"

    you know, plug one nostril and blow

    By Blogger LBseahag, at 12:18 AM  

  • gross, at lesat for the fat ass that left all the sweat on the machine. If the girl was in public and no place to hide while choking on her own loogy, I would have done the same thing.

    One question, how do you keep yourself going to the gym? I need that stamina.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:40 AM  

  • I have a bad habit of spitting on the ground in the public. Mainly a carryover from my days of chewing tobacco. So I apologize for being a public spitter and I am working hard to quit doing it. And the fat dude needs to wipe down everything because that is disgusting.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:55 PM  

  • All I can say is...ewwwwwwww!


    By Blogger Claire, at 9:53 AM  

  • The juice is loose...


    By Blogger The Phoenix, at 11:52 AM  

  • I once worked with a guy that we called Sweaty Scottie. I hated to get ten feet from the guy. He was like a human waterfall of sweat.

    By Blogger :P fuzzbox, at 5:17 PM  

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