Shaken Not Stirred

Monday, October 18, 2004

Another One Bites The Dust

What is it about weddings that makes many people feel completely alone (at least during the ceremony)? I went to a wedding this weekend as my cousin's date. We have this deal that if we can't find a real date, then we are obligated by default to be a sitting goose for one another.

Anyway, although many people were saying aloud, "Another One Bites The Dust", they were most probably thinking, "I wish it had been me". I know that cause I said it aloud, but thought to myself, "I'm alone". Well, I'm not alone, alone. Saritha and I have this deal where we will grow old together, live in a brownstone in New York City and feed our left over microwave popcorn to the pigeons in Central Park. But let's face it, yeah, I haven't had anyone to propose to in a long time.

And then these games that are played during the ceremony. For whose benefit? The tossing of the garter, the tossing of the bouquet? "Will all single, available, alone, miserable people come forward to try and catch some happiness?". My buddies and I opted to be at the bar and pretend that we didn't hear the announcement. I was really obligated to go, being a guest of a guest. So basically I'm twice removed. But we didn't want to be herded like cattle and paraded as single and alone.

I'm beginning to sound bitter. It really was a beautiful ceremony and reception. The bride looked amazing. And a very romantic groom, got down on one knee during the ceremony (during the exchange of vows) to place the ring on the finger of the bride. He also had a hankie ready and wiped the tears from the bride when she said "I do". So it really was awesome. Well, I thought it was awesome.

But in the end, do we really need to parade all the single people around by doing those tosses? I say we toss those traditions out. I'd really rather not see the groom shove his body up the bride's dress in search of the garter anyway.


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